Good morning ... about to call Hurtigruten and consider a trip to Arctic for Northern Lights.
I've pretty much completed constructing the trellis -- all except for netting which may or may not be necessary or may yet go on ...
Surfed Facebook ... sent some recipes to me and other posts to friends. Political posts. These days are hard, dangerous, confusing, worrisome, bad.... YET the Stock Market continues to go up this week. Rather dramatically. Will the other shoe fall?
Big afternoon coming up ... lunch w/Andrew, seeing Jim, a call with hospice coordinator, and then... a elliptical workout (unless I do that in morning, might). And practice for chorus audition (Yesterday was not audition day... tomorrow is...). And then ?? a talk w/new person as per April/jdate???
BTW - sister is having good feelings relative to wig and stuff.
And got work about change/end of yolo care Companion program. But I will continue.
As for Hurtigruten -- seems like there is no currently available NoSingleSuppliment for what I want. I will wait to later in year. And/or find another place and time for some travel.
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At visit w/Jim... I came to the idea... most people live each day without reference to joy or suffering. (I guess suffering gets more attention since pain is more noticeable)... THE POINT.. each of us have a joyful CHARACTER to use the language of Stanley McCristol... ret. General .. and I would say then each of us may then live in the lovely bubble we imagine.... I NOTED ... for myself - that each day I personally do NOT feel joy or suffering... I am just a regular person living a regular/regulated life ... and if I think about it... I find myself FINE, OK, good..... And free and able to come and go pretty much where and when I want.... What I often call ROUTINE... is my REGULATED life. I have made some choices about that and at the moment - AOK... or is it?
For what do I YEARN???? Really? WHAT DO I WANT??? I could say Love. I could say a Hug. I could say someone to touch and be touched by... Someone to talk to/with... Someone lie next to me and hold me and allow me to hold them.... Even as such holding has seemed difficult to me... after some time I want/need to move my arm! Perhaps I should have cared enough to stay up all night in a personally uncomfortable position so as not to disturb my partner???? Truly I am sure I could have loved and been loved and felt love and loved... better than I did. Hard to know for sure.... Did I fail to give and get and reciprocate appropriately or did I not notice the love or lack of love that came my way? I must say that is seems to me if both parties -- or even just one ... agreed to love and accept love... wouldn't that be loverly! It's all I want.... in a room somewhere.. far away from the cold night air ... AAaaaaaaa - to be taken care of... AND to take care of someone else!!!! (Which was a think denied to me once)
The words, completely are:
from My Fair Lady"
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