It is morning on the 15th.... and I guess along with working out - I generally will not blog, either... unless I have the wherewithall after sundown... Which did not happen yesterday.. AND a break once a week is good!!!
READING - and thinking has be wondering about monotheism... a New Yorker book review suggested the primary thing was NO IDOL worship...within religous systems that have references to other gods or a trinity or many gods as amongst Hindu people... Interesting !!! And I wonder if "other" gods might be like preliminary offices/officials similar to bureaucratic folks you go through to get to the Main Person or to G-d?
........Just got a call from Cindy in Florida... they were at the condo cleaning stuff out .. found some silverware and china which I said I would be interested in ... They will pack and ship... I keep saying -- hire someone .. but they will do as they will... very generous! I said something about my father not really wanting me to have/get anything. Cindy's response was - it was good I was in contact with my mother and sister at the end. Cindy said my mother loved me... I didn't share the thought that was part of last night's conversation w/Ellen where the idea that she and my father didn't know how to love. AND I would add something I alluded to in that conversation which was my mother was ineffectual... to some extent. Some have thought (Brucha) that she was the Queen Bee... and that may have been true .. that she was served or to be served by all... However - my father had Power... and he excercised it quite harshly!!! That is excused by some because that is how it was in those days... However - those of us (me) who suffered under that harshness did suffer and were scarred. And that may have/probably did happen to Debbie, too. She just took it differently.
BTW - she didn't know why my grandfather on my father's side died so I will put an email out to Arthur now. As I wrote ... I thought -- maybe I did hear that he died of a heart attack. Anyway - will hopefully hear back, one way or another.\
Today, Sunday -- packing day!!! And workout. And check travel documents, etc.. and send a note to Vic to coordinate some travel.
Yesterday had lunch w/Sarah - getting stuff clear for Passover... She has to get a lot of stuff since I will be gone. AOK... she is being terrific. And - Susan will make a kugel... Sarah and I will take care of salad, etc.. AOK!!!!
Also saw Ellen. Nice afternoon, early evening. Watched most of Sinners and I will finish that while working out. Had dinner at Walnut Creek Original Joe's which was very very good. Sat in the bar area which was fine. Sat near some young women who were celebrating a birthday and did some talking with them... Nice. Then I drove home to sleep in Davis and awake to do stuff... little of which I have actually gotten to yet -- and it is 10:30am. SO -- off to some staging of stuff for my trip, soon.
======puase at 10:40am---------stage packing!!===============NOTE: there are thoughts I recorded on phone and which I should listen to and write up ============
==Back sooner...
Just received a note back from Arthur... Heart attack or stroke - probably at work... Arthur ended note with the phrase - keep in touch... Made me think - well - does he follow the rules of seniority?! As did my father... As I think about my father who never initiated a call/contact with me... I realize my father did maintain a relationship with his older brother but not his younger brother. Was that a matter of ageism? And then there is this very recent cartoon from the New Yorker which speaks to me:
Will I send it to him? To Michael Hirsh? Why bother? And what about another note to R. Simon? Maybe I will add it/make it my Sig File on emails? EEHH.... it is always - why bother?!!! Who do I care about?!!? As they care about me?
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Watched Oscars ... some interesting not-seen movies out there!
AND from Recording NOTE I took while driving:
Change -- Jonah is a story about change...Who really changes? People of Niniveh certainly try? Jonah doesn't change from beginning to end... His caring empathy is absent throughout the story! Individual does not change... Group does change.... And whether or not the change holds is a question for the future while in the moment... it IS REAL...
Is change possible is so often a question. Are we free? From this I considered maturing understandings of G-d... And I wonder - who is comfortable hearing about another's understanding of G-d - or is that often uncomfortable!???
AND THEN - listening to R. Nachman of Bratzlav book... and DESPAIR??? which I have felt relative to Israel and it can apply to anti-semitism...
BUT ABOUT ME... well --- YES, terribly. I too often awake and say - I just don't care... It doesn't matter -- whatever "IT" is?
HOWEVER - the point always is: CHOICE... we are FREE to CHOOSE how to proceed... each day, each moment, with each person, each situdation, etc etc etc...!!!
Note: Despair and Change and Freedom and Caring and Choice... -- ALL connected.... or only a subset .. but these are the essentials... to the FUTURE... to tomorrow... I can/do feel anxiety... AAHHhhhh...
What is The Arc of History... And - HOPE HAPPINESS HERE -- The Way is HERE.... Mindfulness... Seeing, noticing... whatever one wants to noticibly feel...
FROM SECOND NOTES, Recorded
Monotheism vs Idolotry... Phycical idols vs functional idols.. i.e. Intermediaries...And Kabbalah has the ten emonations... Early anthropromorphism was real... and it was The Way to Communicate... talk to humans in human language... BUT - if metophorical... or viewed as such and then MATURE... to The Force... or at least to something beyond physicality, etc..
AND THATS ALL FOLKS....
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