2025 Daily - 07/08/2025 - hospice?

Today may have been the day my sister went onto hospice. She didn't want to talk about her planning to meet with hospice folks at 3pm her time. We spoke at about noon her time. I will call tomorrow and find out what is new. What is new? What is happening? What she tells me says it it VERY hard, painful, uncomfortable, not good!!!! I am now just listening since when I asked her to tell me what she think was likely to be ... how things might be ... she got upset. She has been thinking about this for a long time, she says. She has long talked about quality of life being important and necessary and her quality of life is not good and not likely to get better AND there is the pain and discomfort. SO - I can only hope she gets something good from the hospice folks. They are ok, I think. They are not wonderful in Debbie's experience, I think. I think she would not look back on what they did for Mother as there was the difficulties in getting Mother home AND THEN -- once that was settled it was not as good as hoped for. to put it another way - nowhere was good - not the hospital or the in-hospital hospice or the inhome hospice. For a little while it seemed as if moves to and fro were the way of each day. Maybe not really -- but Mother was very unhappy in the last few days of her life... and didn't like where she was ... wherever that was ... as I recall...

For me -- I am not planning to expecting to go out and wait and watch. I am both not apparently really wanted there NOR would I feel safe as the pain of the folks there easily morphs into anger directed at anyone who doens't do anything more than just be silent and listen to whatever... AND questions are not allowed even as what is said by Debbie are her own questions that might be clarified ... and understood.. but that is not what they allow .. AND ALSO - some of that anger includes acusations and assertions suggesting there is something wrong with me .. or whomever. The Steve outbreak was over the top ... and the double-teaming anger was like my mother and father's way of doing things... NOT a good memory!

SO - I will wait and I have my several reservations and that is that.. about that..

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The rest of my day was ok... Saw Rachel, did some volunteering with Swim America which is Rotary related. Worked out... Watched a movie -- Heads of State - a comedic action romp. Fun!

A part of The Knick I watched had me turning it off as there was a depiction of a riot against blacks where great harm was put on the blacks.... for no good reason except hate, anger, and prejudice ... all unwarrented againt the many victims. DISTURBING...

Also zooomed/googled with Portugal friends... Vic, Marie, Holly.... MAYBE northern Spain in the spring? Trafalgar OR ????

And now -- to bed and sleep... it is about 11:30PM.